My ex-career as a muslimah

One year celebration March 8, 2012

Filed under: Journey — evebitestheapple @ 12:34 am



Last week I celebrated my one year anniversary of leaving Islam and ultimately all religions. It has been a glorious, godless year and I’m looking forward to many more.


Setting the stage – J4 March 17, 2011

Filed under: Journey — evebitestheapple @ 2:08 am

“O Romeo, Romeo wherefore art thou Romeo?”

My first impromptu meeting with a brother is what piqued my interest in marriage. Prior to that meeting, I was perfectly content studying my religion and entertaining ideas of what to do with my life. I didn’t read much about marriage and when I did, it was the occasional paragragh devoted to marrying a ‘fair maiden with dark hair and wide, lovely-eyes’. It was a major turnoff to me that Islamic books encouraged men to marry one type of female. I found it strange for Allah to create women with a diversity of physical traits and then say that only one group of women were preferred. I found it even more striking that there were no descriptions of the best type of men to marry.

The seeds of marriage are always planted in the heart of the new Muslimah but back then it wasn’t as overbearing as it is now. The majority of the sisters I knew had been married for years, recently married, or were about to get married. Most of them married quite young, some as early as 14. The community I was in was mainly made up of immigrants with American wives. At the time, couples made up of two Americans or two immigrants were the minority. Many of those wives were just starting to adopt the religion of their husbands even though they had been married for years so it was like we were all new Muslims. I think those are the primary reasons marriage wasn’t broadcast back then the way it is today. There are many other factors that came into play but they didn’t have as much influence in propagation of marriage on a small, growing community in the south. (more…)


Year of the Tiger – J3 March 5, 2011

Filed under: Journey — evebitestheapple @ 12:19 am

“Tigers are said to be bold and adventurous and are bestowed with initiative and charm. However, they have a tendecy to be risk-takers making them act before they think about the consequences.”

Ringing in January 1998, I was freed from the constraints of employment thus I was a Muslim on the loose looking to strengthen my brand new identity. Unemployment compensation bought me plenty of time to bounce all sorts of ideas around. I didn’t want to stay in the South, so where to go? How to get there? What to do once I got there? Little did I know the light of freedom that allowed me to entertain such questions would soon be dimmed bit by bit, fatwa by fatwa. (more…)


Final call to board the ship off Insanity Island – J2 March 1, 2011

Filed under: Journey — evebitestheapple @ 2:54 pm

Islamic life was pretty uneventful for awhile after I took my shahadah in February ’97. I ended my last relationship with the failed marriage attempt with the Pakistani boy and was mostly done grievieng for my boyfriend. I write mostly because there are parts of me that still grieved years later. But the bulk of the sorrow process was complete.

I vaguely remember fasting some of Ramadhan. The days were short then but even still, I would pop appetite-suppresant pills. I think they were called Dexatrim. I remeber they were popular back then but I think they have since been yanked from store shelves. I think one or two co-workers asked me why I was fasting. Probably the only answer I could give was ‘its what Muslims do’. I would come to learn over the years that this type asnwer would be commonplace for the majority of questions about Islam.

In the beginning, my tryst with the hijab was intermittent. The most I knew about it was that I had to wear it to the masjid and that I had to wear a special prayer suit. I initially didn’t know about the prayer suit but heck, I didn’t know about prayer. Looking back, I realize I took charge of most of my early learning of the basics of Islam. I used to think the Muslims didn’t bother with converts back then because of race issues. Now I think they just didn’t know what they were doing and why they were doing it. I think many immigrants wanted to get away from Islam but it was more the convert spouses, who at the very least were accustomed to church, who propelled the growth of Islam. (more…)


Boy meets girl – J1 February 28, 2011

Filed under: Journey — evebitestheapple @ 3:24 am

Somehow a birthday, an Indian man, and a date turned into a not-far-from-forty year old woman writing about her choice to abandon Islam.


In April 1996 a few days shy of being 23 years of age, I met an Indian man whose name was P****. I always thought it funny that his name was P**** because he certainly didn’t look like a P****. He owned the local convenience store and somehow we got on the subject of my birthday and a short time later we were on a date.

I didn’t know much about the peoples of India nor did I know any Indian people other than a boy that worked with me at a pizza joint during my high school years. I thought P**** was cute and he seemed nice. I wasn’t in the market for a boyfriend but was open to the right person, so on the date we went. (more…)